Royal Stutters and Squalid Mansions

Going to see The King's Speech was great, but sitting next to someone who took one and a quarter hours to munch her way through a giant box of popcorn was not. The only time she stopped troughing on the crackly popcorn was when she sat it on the seat between us to eat her ice cream, slurp at her mega-sized soft drink or check her texts. When I rule the world, people like that will have to wait until movies come out on DVD and watch them at home. Or they'll be sent to dig wells for Madonna in Malawi. Speaking of DVDs though, I just watched Grey Gardens with Drew Barrymore and Jessica Lange. What a fantastic movie! Based on the real-life story of nutty-as-fruitcake cousins to Jackie Kennedy, it's the tale of a mother and daughter who live out their showbiz fantasies in the decaying squalor of their Hamptons mansion. I've been a Jessica Lange fan since Tootsie - who wouldn't be? - but Drew Barrymore is a revelation and the story so fascinating I'm off to rent the documentary which inspired the movie, also called Grey Gardens. And I'm going to watch it at home where no-one can rile me with their bad manners and open-mouthed snacking. (Bugger, forgot I had a husband!)

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